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The Next Step: Letting Go, Holding On

What do you have most trouble letting go of? What do you want to hold on to? I suppose a lot of times the answers to those questions will be the same, but when I ask them of myself I get different answers.

Letting Go.

Perhaps the biggest part of my Cancer Challenges have been the letting go.

Night’s out with my buddies – acting our shoe size -, a dance partner live band and Trapper John’s, living on my own, driving my car, walking Signal Hill and tackling the stairs to the top, regular ice-time with my full gear on – been over 3 years since I’ve done that, having the energy to do most anything I wish, playing soccer and roller-hockey virtually every night of the summer, beating my brother at 21’s – been over 3 years since I’ve done that too but it’s not too hard to let go, coaching hockey – this is a tough one for me to let go, working, furthering my progress towards making my dreams reality.

These are some of the things that I have temporarily let go or that I have adjusted my relationship with. I have found that letting go of those things has resulted in a re-prioritizing of them, as if not being able to do them as I normally would has resulted in an adjustment of my perspective. I can’t say that any of them have dropped in priority, and maybe priority is the wrong word, as when I do get to do them again I know that my enjoyment and appreciation will be higher than ever before. I remember the feeling regaining that extra bit of independence and driving my car for the first time as a Cancer Patient back in December of 1998, I remember how it was when I returned to the bench and showed a player how to keep his shot low and then watch him have success with my lesson, I remember the feeling of making my dream of recreating my experience for high school students and when that became a reality just over a year ago. Those experiences were so enhanced, better than I could have imagined and that is some of the reason why I feel so blessed to have been given these Cancer Challenges. In addition to being great teachers they provide you with such great opportunity to see the world, and all things in it, with such a new perspective. It is a perspective that I wouldn’t change for the world, or anything in it.

Holding On.

Perhaps the best part of my Cancer Challenges have been that they have helped me discover the things that I want to hold on to most.

My relationships with family and friends – they are most important, the love is most important, my memories – the past 26 years and all the amazing ups and downs that have been my life to date, my hopes and dreams and allowing them to grow and adjust as I travel down this road, this moment – I’m holding onto this moment more than ever as I’m more aware of it’s importance, it’s all I fully have.

These are things that I hold with me and they are things that will stay with me forever, no matter what happens with my health Challenges. They are within me and Cancer can’t take them away, truth be told it has helped me grow and appreciate them more than ever. Life is about Opportunities, and they are everywhere in front of us every moment of every day, and we experience Success with the ones we are Prepared for.

Success = Preparation + Opportunity

You can define those words how you wish, but Success can be “happiness, joy, sadness, frustration, but it is often growth” , Opportunities come in all shapes and sizes, this message is an Opportunity for you to learn a little more about the mind and heart of a Cancer Patient, and the Preparation most always is an open mind or an open heart. You will experience Success with all the Opportunities you are Prepared for, I promise.


Live Life. Love Life.


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