I say “don’t wait” but I think what I really mean is don’t let anything get in your way, at least not things that you wouldn’t consider serious obstacles. I’m thinking very specifically about friends, relationships, and as usual I have some very specific thoughts regarding friends and relationships that are connected to experiences I’ve had since my original diagnosis in November 98.
Here’s what I’m thinking… when I was first diagnosed, and again the second time to a much much lesser degree, many people reached out to me. The feeling of concern, love, compassion, and very probably fear for my life, was very real and prominent. That is one of main reasons why I started this email group actually, as I didn’t physically have the energy to connect with everyone in person or on the phone, so I figured I would connect via email. We’ve come a long way since then.
During the early days of my first Challenge I received such great support from people all over my life, from all parts, who were connected to me in many different ways. Some were very best-friends, others I knew only casually, but they were all concerned for my health and expressed that concern to me in various ways. I will never forget that time as when you are in a situation like I was and am it is a great source of comfort to know that you have such great support beyond the family circle, which in my case was and is also extremely supportive. Both very important elements of facing any Challenge I feel.
After my original diagnosis and as the months and now years roll by things change, the dynamics of my interaction with those same people have changed, which I believe is perfectly normal. And I also have spent a great deal of time wondering and thinking about why it does so, and what influences the change.
I am very confident that IF I was writing to you all today from hospital – which I’m not, everything is still flowing very well – but IF I was writing to tell you about another obstacle in my path, a new Challenge, I’m confident that my inbox would be quite full after sending the message. There would be messages of encouragement, concern, and I’m sure offers to help in many different ways.
The question I have been asking myself today is why don’t we, everyone of us, make those offers, express our concern and love, more often. Why do we seem to wait until a big-time Challenge is presented to someone we care for?
I think the easy answer is that when a Challenge is presented we are more aware of the possible needs of our friends, and thus we feel that our efforts could be of some help as they face their Challenge. The truth is that I feel everyone would love a little help, some encouragement or a note to say that they are being thought of, doesn’t matter if they are really sick in hospital or having a “normal” day. Why do we wait to reach out?
I know that as I have grown up I have lost touch with many friends from a whole bunch of circles and I can say with great comfort that I most often make the effort to reconnect with those friends, at least the ones I want to reconnect with. And when I do make that effort it always turns out to be such a great Positive experience that both of us were wanting, however if one of us didn’t reach out then the connection wouldn’t have happened.
So I say to you today… reach out, don’t wait, don’t wait until someone gets sick, or has a Challenge presented, I’m sure your contact will be just as appreciated with or without the presence of a Challenge to tackle. As you know our time here is limited, and every day I’m learning the value and importance of facing our fears and coming from our hearts and a place of Love.
Don’t wait.
Always…
Live Life. Love Life.
Geoff
